You Gotta Want It

When I started this (excuse the obscenely over-used phrase) "weight loss journey," I was... desperate. Without a clue. I had always known what I needed to do to lose the weight, but I never actually applied it to my real life. It's easy to watch the famous Eat Less, Move More video from MadTV and laugh- it's really very simple, right?

Wrong.

You have to want it. Then, and only then, will you find that you can actually apply it to your life.

No more excuses. So you have kids? A husband? A wife? 6 dogs? 3 jobs? One leg? No time for exercise? They sound like personal problems to me. If you don't want it, fine. Blame your kids, blame your job, blame your damn genetics for the reasons why you "can't" lose the weight.

It all starts with your mind. Want it. Want it bad enough that the mere thought of not getting it scares you. The excuses will fall by the wayside. "How could I possibly...?" becomes "Why didn't I try this before??"

I have thought a bit lately about what exactly I want out of these weight loss shenanigans I've been pulling. Looking hot for my wedding? That was definitely the catalyst. But now that I've lost almost half the weight I am aiming for, and I am now at the weight I've been at for most of my life, I'm starting to see the potential.

I'm starting to be able to actually imagine myself at a smaller size. That was something I have never in my life been able to do. I'm not talking about seeing before and after pics of someone who's about my height and starting weight. I'm talking about me.

And I look smokin' hot in this lofty vision of me.

And I know I will obtain it, because I want it.

It has taken me almost 8 months to lose 35 pounds. I'm not the most inspiring blogger out there- I can think of many off of the top of my head who've had much more success more quickly, and you know what? If it works for them, awesome. If they can turn it into a sustainable lifestyle, even more awesome. More power to them. But I'm me, and this is how I'm doing it. Slowly. With lots and lots of mistakes. And that's exactly what's making me want this more.

Because I don't imagine myself at 150 pounds being perfect. Drinking with the girls will happen. Mom's extra-famous once-a-year fried chicken, mashed potatoes, and white gravy dinner will happen. SO WHAT? I gain a pound one week, and lose that pound and a little more the next. The general chart is going down, and if I'm 100% honest with myself, I'm really not losing all that slowly. I think 50 pounds in one year is pretty damn good.

So now that I've realized my potential, I've realized that there are a slew of hidden reasons why I want this. It's easy to say, "For better health" and "to live longer." But people, I'm 22! I haven't had health scares. I just want to feel better. I want to not be winded. I want to jump up and run around and skip and go go go go go and not be out of breath and sweaty. I'm young, I'm beautiful, and dammit I want this because I want to be the best me I can be.

So tell me... why do you want it?